Universal Truths

It amazes me how many people don’t realize these two simple truths.

Things cannot be resolved by ignoring them. In order to have resolution you have to have conflict. Finally the longer you ignore an issue the bigger the monster becomes.

Okay, so I guess that’s three truths but I digress.

I have never been one to hide if I have beef with someone. Maybe it was growing up with brothers that taught me that the sooner you put all your grievances on the table – the sooner you can get the issue resolved and move on with your life.

The longer something is held onto the worse you feel. There becomes this great oppression on your soul. Then there’s the issue that holding onto it causes a larger dent in your pride when the breaking point is finally reached.

I’ve known many people that keep to this ‘if I ignore it, it will go away’ mentality. Sadly I am no longer friends with a lot of them, because I seek conflict for the cause of resolution. They stew and stew over the issue because they are ‘ignoring’ it – and they don’t talk to me. Many times the fact that we don’t come to a resolution becomes my fault and I am the ‘bad guy’. Oh well is all I can say and brush it off my shoulders – I tried to resolve the issue and brush it off my shoulders. (Maybe it’s that attitude that causes the loss of friendship – maybe not… but again I digress)

Which brings me to what I really intended to say – because when I started typing my thoughts (many rants ago) this was a rant on maturity –

What I’ve come to discover is the biggest sign you’ve ‘grown up’ is knowing that something didn’t work out – going to that person and say “I am sorry, I screwed up, I messed up our friendship.” To which the other ‘grown up’ person replies “it’s okay. I have done my share to mess this up too.” From there they RESOLVE the issue. They don’t chew on it, stew over it. They resolve it and put it behind them.

This doesn’t mean that things go back to what they once were. They can’t – but the gnawing on one’s spirit can be removed after resolution.